Addressing the blockers
Unraveling the blockers in our life, with a gentle nudge and lots of kindness
Have you ever untangled a long string of Christmas lights? Or perhaps you were tasked with untangling a string of yarn? Have you experienced the frustration in unknotting the long tendrils of string, only to find that the harder we tug on them, the more tangled it gets? It is so much like the mental blockers that we have in our lives - those things that we have subconsciously told ourselves that we cannot do, that are too hard for us.
Today I wanted to address this. Why do we feel blocked in certain areas of our lives? It feels like no matter what we do in that area, that deep fear and certain failure will creep upon us, like it is destiny.
A part of me feels like - enough already! I am not a young child - I can overcome whatever I put my mind to. I just need to be intentional about it and do the work needed to fix it. And I have done that about 20 times in my life (each time being 2-5 months of intentional work), but the mental block keeps creeping up. Does that mean that no amount of work will ever help? Am I doomed to always have that block in my mind?
I refuse to accept that! (even though my subconscious really wants to).
I think that each time I have worked on my mental block - addressed it - it has chipped away on that blocker - little by little. Each time, I have felt more confident going back to it, because the size of the mental block keeps decreasing.
My mental block is about advanced mathematics - the type of mathematics that is used for artificial intelligence and neural networks. It isn’t that I don’t understand it, it is that I don’t think in that math all the time, and so I forget it unless I keep going back to it (which I don’t seem to want to because I think I will forget again) - see that vicious circle? I need to keep working through the math because it seems like my self confidence is strongly tied to it. The better I am with the math, the more optimistic I feel, the better I represent myself in meetings. So it seems like I have no choice but to address my mental blocks - even if I really don’t want to do it subconsciously!
Today I am setting the intention that I am ok living with this mental block - but while I am living with this block, I want to address it, and unravel it bit by bit. This is my brain and my karma and my work to do, to overcome the obstacles in my way. This is my obstacle in my life, and the more I let it be, the bigger it is growing. It might be the size of a tiny ball of yarn that I can hold between by fingers, but in my head it is a mammoth of a ball of yarn filling an entire room.
Hello little mental block - I see you today. I see that you are fearful of me, but I am here to listen to you, and get all the resources for you to help you become a cohesive part of me - to not be afraid anymore! You are trying to tell me something, by creating this strong emotion in me of fear and discomfort - and I am listening to you. You need me to work on addressing what you are telling me - like a cut or scrape shouts for attention of a band aid. Maybe you need more than a band aid, maybe you need a cast, or surgery - I am here for you. I am here to figure out how we slowly unravel this little mental block. Today I am going to list 3 things that I can do, and I will come back to this in a few days and talk about it with myself.
I would love to hear more about mental blocks that others are facing, how are you addressing them? How can I help you connect with others going through similar things?